Monday, 10 April 2006

Blog Fraud

Or, The Ego Has Landed.
211 visitors. Yeah, right. I reckon 10 at most. The bloody counter has turned into the equivalent of the light in the fridge. If I close the door, is it off? If I sneak a peak at the counter will it have lept up by thirty, forty, fifty? Now, only one and that'll be me checking to see if the counter has lept up by thirty, forty, fifty.
Once it reaches three hundred I'm expecting my computer to disappear in a fit of pique only to resurface in Brazil having had an op to become a transsexual piano player in a modern jazz Rolling Stones tribute band.

Just watching

Hitchhikers Guide (etc) on DVD.
Like a total prude and the kind of idiot I abhor, loathe, detest etc I feel the need to complain about the absence of the following lines. Please note that the accuracy of memory may mean I'm slightly out on the word front, thank god.

"I feel like a military academy. Bits of me keep passing out."

"It's at times like this I wish I'd listened to the things my mother told me."
"Why, what did she say?"
"I don't know. I didn't listen."

Right. I promise I'll never do that again.