And while I'm not on the subject

I have one plant in the flat, a lilly. It has dandruff.
One of my best friends is pregnant and quite possibly giving birth right now (avoided the temptation to used the word 'dropping', very mature me) and I'm due to be an uncle in May.
When I think about the possibility of having my own family I take the view that I shouldn't be allowed to bring up a child when I can't even look after a house plant.